Shine on, Shine on Harvest Moon

I have now been "OnThe Pill" for 7 days and daily monitoring of my chest and stomach measurements has so far not revealed any alarming increases.

Janice's theory is that The Complete Man is targeted at dykes and the dubious warning is in case they get "taken off-guard" whilst under the influence!

The Welsh Bard has his own take on the matter:

Baltzer’s life is in a mess,
Filled with minor ills;
Chris’s life is filled with stress,
So he goes to Boots for pills...

Chris has just turned sixty six,
And he’s always been a bloke
So, if the chemist’s up to tricks,
He doesn’t see the joke...

On the packet, Baltzer reads
The info, ‘til he sees at last,
That every pregnant user needs
To see the doctor pretty fast...

And so his latest health kick ends,
As Chris serves Boots with writs:
He’s male, and doesn’t want his friends
To mock his leaky tits...

It’s far too late for that, you clown –
Your secret’s out, and it’s been logged.
Just take those pills and keep ‘em down,
And let us know when you have sprogged!

Meanwhile, it was "Ground Hog" day for the fifth time at The Princess Hall last Monday night on the occasion of the 2012 Rushmoor in Bloom Awards Ceremony.

Unfortunately, only the Mayor changes and it was another Silver Gilt in The Best Allotment class but considering that I had spent considerably less time "down the plot" this year, it was more than I had expected.

As we seem to spend more and more time away from Farnborough now I have decided to down-size the plot.

Currently I have Plot 24A  and half of Plot24B which I share with my old chum Sav.

Next year I will relinquish my half share and reorganise Plot24A which should make the maintenance a bit easier.

Now that the caravan season is drawing to a close we have two holidays booked - 3 weeks in Pafos in October and 3 weeks in Fuzetta in November/December. Hopefully there will be some good days in January for me to make the changes to the allotment because The Algarve beckons again in February.

Back in Lesley we have entered the Bunn Leisure Best Kept Caravan competition and await the results. With a first prize of £500 and runners up of £300 and £200 at each of the three sites, we thought it was worth making the effort.

It does look really nice and all the credit for the flowers and shrubs must go to Janice. I just buy the plants!

On the Lunar front, The Harvest Moon is coming this weekend! The moon has been waxing larger each night, and full moon is the night of September 29-30, 2012. In traditional skylore, the Harvest Moon is the full moon closest to the autumnal equinox. For us in the Northern Hemisphere, the autumnal equinox came on September 22. That makes the September 29-30 full moon the Harvest Moon.

So why is this moon called the Harvest Moon?

The shorter-than-usual time between moonrises around the full Harvest Moon means no long period of darkness between sunset and moonrise for days in succession. In the days before tractor lights, the lamp of the Harvest Moon helped farmers to gather their crops, despite the diminishing daylight hours. As the sun’s light faded in the west, the moon would soon rise in the east to illuminate the fields throughout the night.

Take it away Neil! 

Hey Ho!

Eve of Destruction

In an attempt, probably misguided, to improve my vitamin intake I recently purchased from Mr. Boots the Chemists Son, a product with the grand title of "Boots Complete Man".

Before I took my first capsule I followed the good old adage, "Always read the small print".

Here is what it said on the back of the box:

Boots Complete Man 

• · Formulated specifically for men.
• · Contains 22 essential nutrients.
• · Promotes general health and well-being.
• · 30 Capsules- One a day.

How to Use

• · Always read the product information before use.
• · Take one capsule a day with liquid.

Hazards and Cautions

• Do not exceed the stated dose
• Not suitable for children under 12 years.
• Do not use if foil is broken. 
• During pregnancy and breastfeeding or if trying to become pregnant we suggest that you consult with your pharmacist or doctor before taking this product.

You will notice that I have highlighted two of the bullet points. Am I missing the point here or am I completely out of touch with reality!

Are these capsules designed to turn me into a women and a rather late in life pregnancy!

When I mentioned this to The Young Allotmenteer he suggested that I look on the bright side and at worse after a week of taking the pills I would be able to multitask and make a perfect rhubarb crumble!

What is the world coming to?

The Euro is in crisis, England are taking on Afghanistan at cricket, the Tory Chief Whip Andrew Mitchell is abusing Johnny Plod in public, my mate Gerald Howarth MP has been sacked from his post as Junior Minister of Defence (doubtless Joanna Bloody Lumley had the ear of the PM) and the Royal Family are having to take the European press to court to stop publishing the invasive photos of the Duchess of Cambridge sunbathing topless.

Incidentally it is rumoured that to celebrate Kate Middleton's French media banning order, Royal Dalton are to release a limited edition pair of small commemorative jugs!!!!

What  a nasty world we live in. Here's Barry McGuire's take on the world in 2012:

The original Eve of Destruction was written by P F Sloan  in 1965 and first offered to the Byrds who refused it. Barry McGuires version was released later that year and topped the charts all over the world.

I for one spent at least 10 bob a day to hear it "over and over and over and over again, my friend" on the juke box of a grotty little coffee bar in Ipswich for at least 12 months. At a tanner a play that's a lot of revolutions in a year.

The vocal track was thrown on as a rough mix and was not intended to be the final version, but a copy of the recording "leaked" out to a radio DJ, who began playing it. The song was an instant hit and as a result the more polished vocal track that was at first envisioned was never recorded. McGuire (now 77) recalls that "Eve of Destruction" was recorded in one take on a Thursday morning (from words scrawled on a crumpled piece of paper), and he got a call from the record company at 7:00 the following Monday morning, telling him to turn on the radio—his song was playing.

Let's hear the original one more time just for old times sake:

Still brings me out in goose bumps!

Hey Ho!

You're never too old for an adventure ...........

We had a great day in Chichester on Thursday last although inevitably several more pubs were involved than originally planned.

And not just once but twice on account of the fact that while waiting for the bus back we realised that the Waterstones bag of books that Janice had bought me was no longer with us.

So we had to retrace our steps and revisit each pub we had been in. Well you couldn't just ask so had another drink in each one until we found the books, which, of course, was the first pub we had been in and the last one we checked!!

Before all this we had breakfast as planned in the Vestry who had even laid on a party for me!!

Then lunch at Marco's, highly recommended if you happen to be in the area of Chichester. Then it got messy!

One of the books I received is called " The Hundred-Year Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared".

It is hilarious and I can highly recommend it: 

Sitting quietly in his room in an old people's home, Allan Karlsson is waiting for a party he doesn't want to begin. His one-hundredth birthday party to be precise. The Mayor will be there. The press will be there. But, as it turns out, Allan will not...
Escaping (in his slippers) through his bedroom window, into the flowerbed, Allan makes his getaway. And so begins his picaresque and unlikely journey involving criminals, several murders, a suitcase full of cash, and incompetent but very human police. As his escapades unfold, Allan's earlier life is revealed. A life in which  - remarkably - he played a key role behind the scenes in some of the momentous events of the twentieth century.

Here's a snippet:

Julius applied the brakes just in time. The corpse fell forwards and hit his forehead on an iron handle.
“That would have been really painful if the circumstances had been a little different!” said Allan.
“There are undoubtedly advantages to being dead,” said Julius.

The Hundred-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared is an international phenomenon. A hilariously funny and quirky debut novel by Swedish author Jonas Jonasson, it has already been translated into 30 languages and sold 2 million copies across the globe. A Swedish film is in production and will get an international release in 2013.

Jonas Jonasson was born in Sweden in 1962. He has a professional background as a journalist and media consultant:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/lifestyle/9386562/Jonas-Jonasson-My-100-year-old-hero-and-the-secret-of-happiness.html

Jonasson describes the book as:

"An intelligent, very stupid book. My perspective is that we live only once, I cannot be sure but that is what I believe. I think that if you've once asked yourself: 'Should I...' then the answer is: 'Yes!' How would you otherwise ever get to know that you shouldn't?".

Put it on your Christmas list - there are only 95 days to go!!



 

Hey Ho!

Unlucky for some ...............

The actual history of why number 13 is considered unlucky is somewhat elusive.

One popular theory states that the number is connected to the last 13 Knights Templar being burned alive to end the Crusades on Friday the 13th, and thus has been deemed unfortunate.

Another theory revolves around monks involved in maintaining the yearly lunar calendar when there are 13 full moons some years instead of 12, resulting in confusion of church festivals. Because of this confusion, years with 13 full moons became unlucky. 

Regardless of the true history, there are many people who are fearful of anything associated with the number, so much so that the phobia has been given a name: triskaidekaphobia.

The number 13, especially Friday the 13th, has long been considered lucky in Judaism, and some think that the general population's fear of 13 stems from anti-Semitism.

As far as I'm concerned 13 is most definitely the luckiest number of all. My father disagreed.

Why? - well I was born on Friday 13th September 1946 at number 13 Trent Road in Ipswich.

The Welsh bard appears to agree with my dad.

Friday 13^th 1946...

In September Forty Six,
Suffolk folk were in a fix –
The war had gone but Baltzer had arrived!

In Ipswich everyone was glum,
wondering what on earth had come
To test them after all they had survived.

The omens, one would have to say,
were bad – that dreaded date and day
Could well portend disaster, but hear this:

Ever since that fateful day,
all bad luck has come my way...
I’ve never yet been bought a beer by Chris!

Rather surprisingly, my arrival didn't make the national news but here's what did:

(To read the news, right click on the image and click "Open link in a new window" you can then left click to zoom in)

Notice that the papers cost 1 old pence and footballer Albert Stubbins was tranferred from Newcatle to Liverpool for £13000, the second highest transfer in  league history!

But it's not just my birthday today, its happy birthday to sportsmen Michael Johnson (45), Goran Ivanisevic (41), Shane Warne  (43) and Robin Smith(49), comedian Bobby Davro (54), Ringo Starr's son Zak (47) and Paul McCartney's daughter Stella (41).

From the world of literature J B Priestley was born this day in 1894 and Roald Dahl in 1916.

Film actress Jacqeline Bisset, shown here portraying Miss Goodthighs with Peter Sellers in Casino Royale, was born on 13th September 1944:

and actor Richard Kriel, Roger Moores' arch enemy in two James Bond films, was born on September 13th 1939:

No blog would be complete without music, so before I depart to Chichester to celebrate my 66th birthday in style, with breakfast at the Vestry, lunch at Marco's all washed down with a baker's dozen of beers at the Park Tavern, here are two clips by artists who were born on 13th September.

First Mel Torme, nicknamed "The Velvet Fog", born in 1925, singing one my favourite records and one of the first I ever bought:

That clip brought back a few memories! I must have been in there somewhere.

And now, predictably a moon song, sung by the lovely Katie Melua, born this day 1984:

And to finish another 66 year old, a song written by Booby Troup in 1946, recorded in the same year by Nat King Cole and subsequently by over 50 artists including the Chuck Berry and The Rolling Stones, appropriately entitled Route 66:

Hey Ho!